inspiration for the name

just glancing back over some old entries on myspace and came across this blog from almost a year ago- which inspired the namesake for this blog site. still makes me smile now as i look back at this "life" i've left behind for a slower more simple one at home...



:.Smashing social conformities one kook at a time.: (March 8, 2007)
I get like this when I am tired. All social conformities slip my mind and my alter ego tries to smash 'em. Why else do I loudly imitate the whimpering sound that makes Berkely's head tilt side-to-side amongst the politely quiet ferry crowd; or do the running man in the middle of the crosswalk... I felt like hitting my newspaper upside the shoulder of this nice woman getting in the elevator with me- not in a mean, abusive sort of way, but rather a buddy-ol-pal, how's ya doin sorta way. Never met her before, and I have to think that even if I had, this small, Chinese lady in her late sixties would not appreciate such a "friendly" gesture. I want to run and smack into the glass door of the conference room filled with executives- like a bug that veered of the course and splatted on the window of a Mercedes.
Talking with Eric on the ferry this morning, we both agreed we have the potential to be labeled as crazy, or loony. This is if we allowed ourselves to fully embrace the extremities that surface when no one is looking. He mentioned: ala Alfred Hitchcock's the Rear Window. When no one else is looking, we can carry on multiple conversations with a non-existent person, roll boogers in fingers, yell BLA BLA BLA at the conference call managerial initiator- BASICALLY think, act and look different when not under the societial microscope of life.
Lastly, I thought, what a shame I don't have the wherewithall to race the other patron to press the elevator button and then close the elevator door in their face (this sounds vengeful, but I promise, I have no ill will in these idiosyncrasies) or bust out with Scissor Sister's "I don't feel like dancing" in Pioneer Sq. I think it's tragic, and the social norms should change.
However, if there is one thing we know, is that we humans are not a perfect image of balance. So, should it be customary to yell in public transportation, jump in the elevator, race people to the Starbucks line, hug a stranger, tell the truth, ask to eat someone's food...etc. Then the pendulum would shift somehow, and before we knew it, it would be uncouth to wave hello to someone. No matter what culture/class/country/society you become involved in, there will be norms. Even if the norm is breaking the norm. By breaking the norm, you are the norm. I think that what is beautiful about coloring outside the lines, is that the lines make us thankful that there is an outside of the box. Thank you appropriateness.

my soul waits

I wait for the Lord, my soul waits,

and in His word I put my hope.

My soul waits for the Lord....

-Psalm 130:5-6

Valentine's Day Homage to a life no more

drinking the morning dew, sipping the silence

bloomberg will ring elsewhere- not welcome on my doorstep

open the windows, let the primroses and turpentine waft

through and through

at the end of the day/end of the line/end of the year/end of my life/

what remains to satisfy is one and only You

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly

thank goodness for the Historic Orchard Theater and it's brilliant selection of worldly acclaimed movies. can't wait for The Diving Bell & the Butterfly. even the soundtrack sounds wonderful~

I want to create a masterpiece

In beginning a new painting on a smaller canvas than normal, I achieved the color palatte I asipired to- for once. A creamy robin's egg (or tiffany's box) blue and a peachy meltaway orange... With variations of those two, I began. Roller coaster of emotions towards this piece also began. At one point, I wanted to pick it up and smash it against the wall. You see, there is no tension, no discomfort or emotion that the viewer feels when looking at it. That's what I define as good art... anyway, maybe if i do smash it against the wall, it will be uncomfortable to look at. There we go- goal achieved.

a delicious experience

Hemingway poetically described each meal he ate and drank in A Moveable Feast- leaving the following words touchingly etched on my heart & lips;

“As I ate the oysters with their strong taste of the sea and their faint
metallic taste that the cold white wine washed away, leaving only the sea taste and the succulent texture, and as I drank their cold liquid from each shell and washed it down with the crisp taste of the wine, I lost the empty feeling and began to be happy and to make plans.”

Moving throughout the 1920’s in Paris for him became an art form in of itself in
every meal, aperitif, and communal meeting at a café on the Left Bank.

This morning, I felt blessed to sit at our “café” table and sip café au lait and savor my homemade grapefruit et almonde scone topped with mom’s huckleberry jam. The petite pink grapefruit sat perfectly in its dish, contrasting the serious morose colors of the William Blake painting of the Ten Virgins.

Food can be such an experience, savored and relished. It can even be an act of worship. Yay, verily yes! Communion might come to mind, and while this holy sacrament was Jesus’ charge to the disciples to “Do this in remembrance of Me”, we can even look beyond this and to every aspect of our daily lives other than the Eucharist on Sundays. Think of your morning cup of joe- it can be transformed into… your last sip of peaceful rest before a day of hecticacy (I made that word up). Where you are whisked away to a place where you can linger in life’s little joys… Sound like an International Delight commercial? Yeah, a bit cheesy, I admit. However- let that not distract from my point. Think about your dinner- how it can be a moment to thank God for the taste buds we have to taste curry, anise, basil, nutmeg, sweet & savory. That we have a moment to slow down and abide in Him- whether it is breakfast, lunch, dinner or dessert.

In French Women for All Seasons, Mireille Guiliano states: “ The joy of living is in direct proportion to how much pleasure you know how to derive from every aspect of living…the French lifestyle offers examples of delicious experience beyond just the gastronomic. Everything from how we move to how we groom ourselves to how we greet each day has the potential for unlocking pleasure and making life feel fuller.” (!)

I am going to bake some baguettes for dinner tonight to eat alongside a bottle of red wine.
Eat and be well.~